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Dear Dr. Cherrye,
Teaching our children to respect authority figures, teachers, established rules and regulations, their elders and just plainly the law of our great land is not extremely popular anymore. As I go about my day, I must wonder what has gone wrong, and what if anything, we can do to get our children back on track. Any ideas, Dr. Cherrye?
Dear Any ideas,
Yes, Dr. Cherrye does have a few ideas about ‘teaching our children to respect’, but my advice may not resonate with a few people. While it is not my intention to ‘step on any one’s toes’ I might address many topics separately. I will begin with parenting and home training where I personally believe first teachings should begin.
Parenting/Home Training
Teaching our children to respect can be remembered with this slogan, “the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world”. When rearing our children, we must foresee their future. Sometimes we must reach in our ‘parenting toolbox’ for ideas of things that may work or look. How might you steer your child in the direction in which you will want to view them as adults? What sort of neighbors will your children be in the community? What sort of work ethic will they have? What about their care and compassion for community, friends, parents, teachers?
Albeit some children may be taught the special qualities you will want to observe within them, but they still may not ‘get it right‘, but it is always worth a try, and I feel early teachings in these areas are the responsibility of all parents. Parents must give their best effort toward rearing children who will make great people within our society. A great source to read on rearing great kids is ‘Raising Great Kids.’
When children are taught at home to care for others, embrace difference, and follow rules, we have wholesome children who are great citizens living amongst us who will one day become great adults. In addition, we hear less and less about bullying which is an epidemic in our schools. I’d like to direct you to one of my articles titled, ‘The Wild, Wild West’. Within this article I write about effective bonding with our children and how to discipline with love. We need your help, parents? We need solutions for teaching our children manners, and respect – all this for a better world with them.
Teaching our children to respect classroom and school rules is widely taught on the first day and few weeks of schools. Teachers and staff alike constantly remind students at school of rules. To enhance school/classroom rules, teachers also need the support of parents. This means teachers and parents should become a team. They both will have the best wishes for the children at heart.
Teachers must remain consistent never deviating from their rules. A Yes, must be Yes, and No must be No.
Teachers/Educational System
Some may think this is minor, but as an educator, I’ve noticed a lack of respect during morning announcements. School Principals usually share lots of essential information during this brief time, and many times students are viewed socializing with their peers. This is a great teachable moment for teachers asking students to remain silent respecting that the leader of the campus is speaking over the intercom. Also, whether one believes in saluting the flag, or not, children should be taught to stand and pledge allegiance to both our United States and Texas flags (or whichever flag is observed within your state). If not, they should remain quiet so that other students/teacher can give their allegiance in peace – thus exemplifying respect.
Adults would be wise not inflicting their disdain for our flags on children. There will be plenty of time for children to make their own decisions. Another observation – If there are flags posted in the classrooms, students who choose to stand often do not face the flags. It would be great for teachers to demonstrate this practice.
Teaching our children to respect authority figures and adults is necessary! We have far too many teens and young adults caring less and running rampant on our streets without a care for their future. Do you know where your children are? Do they have a curfew? Robbery and thief have soared these last few years, and it is incredibly sad to see current news reports. In addition, I hear profanity spewing out of the mouths of our youngsters with no regard to the elders in their company. Where have we gone wrong in this area?
Laws of our Land
Teaching our children to respect laws of the land can begin as early as play dates and birthday party celebrations. Before doing so, think about the end results. What manners do you expect your child to follow? What are your expected rules for sharing and playing nicely? These are but a few ideas to think about, and this article, posted by Very Well Family, titled, ‘How to Plan a Playdate for Kids’ written by Amanda Rock on June 19, 2020, is a great start – full of wonderful ideas.
Teaching our Children to respect Earth Day is another way to enhance teachable moments. When our children begin school, they learn about ‘Earth Day’. It is a celebration widely taught in our schools. Parents can begin teaching the importance of keeping our parks and recreational facility grounds clean and tidy. There are rules to be followed when parents obtain permits from park officials as they schedule birthday parties at the park.
Parents can use this teaching, family fun and bonding time as teachable moments sharing park rules as defined in the city permit. One such rules is to clean up afterward, and the importance of recycling. Children can be taught to feel proud of keeping their parks clean, tidy, and saving their earth. Teach your children to pick up paper and debris and then deposit in trash barrels before leaving the facility. By doing so, this teaches care and that others coming behind them can enjoy the cleanliness, too.
Teaching our children to respect the judicial system has to be important to us, and we can begin just as soon as they begin to talk and understand how to read signs such as the crosswalk signs, park signs (do not litter) and such. It is never too early to begin instructing our children about the laws of courts and government. So, you see, Dr. Cherrye believes that parents, teachers and community leaders can work in tandem teaching our children to respect.
OPEN FOR COMMENTS
I look forward to hearing your thoughts and opinions in the comment section below.
IMPORTANT
I have made it my mission to assist parents and educators in resolving the bullying issues children suffer. Offering your feedback and suggestions in the comment section could facilitate meaningful dialogue on this critical issue among ourselves and I encourage this. I will respond to each comment in a timely way. Should you wish to speak privately with me, please email me at cherryeVasquez@gmail.com and I will reply promptly.
Please take advantage of my 3 Free resources by downloading them today. One of them includes my FREE Bullying Checklist. If you feel that your child has been bullied, please
Loving the play date with kids. It’s a great opportunity to allow them to participate in the process of practicing respect.
Yes. I truly believe in play dates. Parents can observe, redirect and learn so much about their children. It’s an awesome way to utilize teachable moments.
Thank you for stopping by Elaine. I appreciate you.
Lovely article stressing the importance of respect and thoughtfulness as necessary behavior we should require in our children – not just at home but at school and in society. Kindness and thinking of how others might feel would go a long way to improving our society as a whole!
I agree with you, Sherrill. Although it appears we are slipping in SOME of these areas, there is still hope for tomorrow – in keeping with stressing and teaching the need for kindness to all. Wouldn’t it be great to live in such a society?
As usual Dr. Cherrye, you hit the proverbial nail on the head! Kids learn early on to look to their parents for direction and instinctively know that creative discipline, applied thoughtfully, translates to “I know you teach me to behave because you love me and want me to be a good girl”. My own daughter, when she was four, literally said that to me and it was so reassuring to hear her make that observation and that she instinctively knew that I would be pleased to know that she understood. I’m sure we all have those moments of beautiful clarity between ourselves and our little ones and it is refreshing to witness their wisdom and that it emanates from what we gently try to teach them. Kids feedback to us in the most unsuspecting ways. One such way is to simply observe how they treat others and how they treat their toys. My daughter would speak to her dolls and I would hear her repeating what she has learned and that is very confirming feedback.
I firmly believe that every child will have their moments of wilfullness and might even pick up on some bad manners from their peer associations. However, what they learn by example in the home, will always come home to roost. They will also go through periods of assertiveness and displaying their independence or the need for it. So we give them a little more rein as they rise to the occasion and display that they are ready for it and that always entails their ability to respect and be courteous to others.
You are so right to mention the need to respect traditions and symbols whether we honor them or not. We simply respect that others may honor them and we must always be tolerant of such differences. You’ve really covered the gamut of examples and I’m sure that most parents have an appreciation for your values.
Tolerance is critical evidence that your child is maturing and it translates into sound empathy and respect toward others and not only being concerned about their own wishes and needs. They will have learned that there will be times when the answer is no and of course, many when the answer is yes and will have learned to roll with that.
Oh, yes! Isn’t it refreshing to have such a bond with our ‘littles’ that we are in sync with behaviors one to another? I agree, we must observe them at play with friends (on play dates), family (cousins), and with their toys. As parents we can gain so much knowledge about our children, their affects, and temperaments, and we’d be wise to do so. Whenever those flare ups occur, we will be so in-tuned to our child(ren) that we can pull those little goodies ‘out of our hats’ and redirect getting things back to normal with (our little sweeties).
Traditions are so important to our societal cultures and heritages, so its always best to teach our children to respect them earlier on. If our children decide as adults to ‘fall back’ that will indeed be their choices, but at least we’ve done our jobs. Right?
Thank you for stopping by Linda. You always add so much to this community of parents and educators.